Well being as I’m too lazy to type shit out I’ll make it short and simple. For me it’s a chemical thing so it’s not something that’s ever gunna go away which really is irritating. I’m usually tired all day. I deal with a lot of negative thoughts or just out of nowhere I’ll be hate with a wave of just “eh” if that makes sense. Those days where everything is going good and I’m not sad, I get suspicious because I’m just not used to that so it feels like something is wrong even though it isn’t. I constantly feel like I’m just faking it all and that it’s not real which fucks with me even more. It really gets in the way of me having fun sometimes which really sucks. I really hate the fact that I’m gunna have to deal with it my whole life. At the end of June I sort of tried to end things. I partly wanted it all to stop and partly just wanted some fuckin help. I got put in inpatient care for a few days and then went home but I’m still dealing with a fuck ton of stuff. And what really gets me is the fact that I have nothing to really be sad about, I just am and that’s cause it’s a chemical thing for me. I just really hope I can find a way to make things better. I’m seeing a therapist now so I’m hopeful that this will help me.