What are the things that people who haven't suffered the type of abuse you did don't understand about experiencing it/recovering from it or the things that they get wrong when talking about it?

TW: Some of my opinions might be unpopular, but it needs to be said. I have found mainstream narratives about csa to be more traumatizing bc I don't relate to a lot of them.

1) I agree with the other poster that CSA isn't always painful. It also doesn't have to include penetration.

2) Some survivors don't have their sex lives negatively impacted. I understand that hypersexuality and hyposexuality are valid responses, but it's not fair to think that every survivor neatly fits into that binary. Some survivors had a high libido before the csa happened.

3) My sexual preferences don't stem from trauma. So, please don't try to change what I like bc you think "it's trauma-related and we need to "fix you." While sexual kinks stemming from trauma can be the case for some people (I don't want to say it can't happen), professionals and I have confirmed that I am wired this way. There are people without csa who also like what I like. Just let it be.

4) Talking about csa over and over again doesn't do anything for me. I am still the same person. I am fine as I am. Some people think that talking about it in detail is going to improve my life. It made things worse frankly.

/r/CPTSD Thread