What do you believe to be the strongest argument against Bernie?

I noticed you posted this question on the subs for all 3 nominees. I'm sure you've found ample material for Clinton and Trump here. Look at all three of your threads. This is the only one where people are treating you with at least some respect and talking about the issues. Your own work highlights the biggest strength of our campaign which is that the truth is more important to us than winning.

(Now imagine that I've changed into a suit and tie, burned myself to orange, given myself a douchey haircut, made a million dollars and pickpocketed a homeless guy. I'm as Republican as they come and not holding any punches.) Here are my attacks against Sanders:

  1. Higher taxes will encourage tax evasion and the rich will just take either their money or themselves to tax havens. Companies that employ lots of millionaires will come up with creative solutions to offshore their salaries just like they offshore their earnings right now.
  2. A higher minimum wage will increase underemployment, which is already a problem because of ObamaCare. It will also lead to higher unemployment and one person having to do the work of two. Illegal immigrants will also become costlier to employ and we'll be flooded by illegals who will be lured by it. Costs of things will go up, making our exports less competitive in the market. We will not be able to compete with Chinese workers who cost a lot less.
  3. Overweight and lazy people (many of whom are not white) will be able to get free treatment on my dime. They will be discouraged from trying to find work and better themselves because of the handouts.
  4. Infrastructure that the poor and smelly use everyday will be improved.
  5. English, Philosophy and Drama majors will increase like cancer because college will be debt free.
  6. Other countries will see us as soft, American hegemony will be over and ISIS will bring us under the caliphate. Palestine's cherry bombs will completely annihilate Israel.
  7. We will turn into a socialist state and crash and burn just like USSR and Venezuela. American industry will be ruined after the government takes it over. Ruined, I tell you. Capitol Hill will look like the Pravda.
  8. The deficit will increase and our credit rating will go down. War will break out with China over our debt we'll have nothing but our Philosophy majors (who can argue anyone to death) left to fight it with.
  9. We will spend untold millions on climate change and summers will still remain hot.
  10. Lack of lobbying and PACs will impoverish the political class and nobody will run for or win elections.
  11. Guns and gun related deaths will increase.
  12. Same-Sex marriage will be legalized and we'll have "homos in the military." We'll have to use export controls to stop that YMCA song from getting the wrong hands lest someone uses it to disarm our troops by starting an impromptu dance party.

I tried but couldn't come up with any more. There's a good defense for each of them but I'm too tired to type. I don't care if people downvote this comment but I'd like it more if they downvote after countering my arguments. I'm not gonna edit or delete this and the numbering for the arguments will not be changing.

/r/SandersForPresident Thread