What cringeworthy moment from your past keeps you up at night?

I was at a friends birthday party, lots of people. I was new to drinking at the time and lacking experience I drank a full 1 ltr bottle of Jim beans whisky and another 500ml or so of vodka. Needless to say I was blackout drunk very quickly and didn't get out to the club. When everyone got back they decided to do an assortment of drugs while I was dying on the couch someone fed me god knows what. In the morning I woke up in a room with everyone looking at me awkwardly and when I asked what happened I was told that I tried forcing myself onto multiple girls that night. Not remembering any of it is the worst thing and the recounts people told me of the night keep me awake (i even thought of killing myself for a few weeks after) and I'm absolutely terrified of getting blackout drunk again luckily my friends don't seem bothered by it since nothing actually happened but i'll never know since i'm afraid to bring it up. (I apologized to everyone, the regret I felt in the morning i don't think i will ever forget)

/r/AskReddit Thread