It would have been nice to be able to know and come to terms with having a disability. But that's part of the process I guess, to learn trauma is real and symptoms are real. It's still not completely sunk in even after several years of it. The world I grew up in had no idea about these things. I had a serious illness and there was no help whatsoever. I can barely comprehend that. It just shows me how untrustworthy this modern world is and all of it's knowledge. It's horrible to have been forced to suffer this much because of lack of care for a disability. People talk about Texas letting them down, well my suffering and fighting for my life has been going on since the very beginning.

I would say the most important peices of information are that, the mind can change the brain meaning we can calm the nervous system by inhabiting the body. Also, probably the most important is trauma is in the body and doesn't leave until it's processed/released. Psychology still hasn't figured that out and recommends CBT for trauma. The last and equally important is that processing is dangerous if you're not ready. I had to separate from everything traumatizing me and start to calm the nervous system before any progress could be made.