It's hard to explain--particularly to someone who has never felt anything similar. I don't know how I would explain feeling tired to someone who's never felt tired, for example. I could try, but they probably wouldn't get it. I could point to correlates of feeling tired, such as having trouble keeping your eyelids open, but that doesn't really explain what it's LIKE. And someone who is skeptical as to whether "feeling tired" is a coherent reality could always point to complicating factors. . . don't people also have trouble keeping their eyes open when they are simply staring at too bright of a light? Does that mean anyone who squints at the sun is "feeling tired"?

Of course, feeling tired is not a rigorous scientific concept. People can feel tired in multiple ways. They can be "tired" as in "sleepy," but they can also be "tired" as in "fed up with something" (i.e. I'm sick and tired of you).

I look at being a woman (and "feeling like a woman") as something similar. I think a wide spectrum of folks--from conservatives to GCs--have attempted to apply an overly rigorous definition of the word that is out of step with how it's often actually used.

But I see "feeling like a woman" as less of a rigorous truth proposition and more of an informal attempt at communicating what someone is experiencing. As a trans woman, I could talk about some of the times I've felt like a woman, and some of the times I haven't, and what was going on with me at those different times. But this is personal and messy and subjective, and I'm not willing to do it with someone who is looking to debate truth claims rather than empathetically listen to me talk about my life.

Likewise, I probably wouldn't bother explaining to someone what "feeling tired" is like for me if that person has already decided that feeling tired isn't possible and doesn't exist. Seems like a recipe for miscommunication and a likely waste of time.