I can’t speak as someone who received support, rather as someone that provided it.

My brother’s wife had pre-existing anxiety and depression that she wouldn’t treat so once their baby came, it really exacerbated it. My brother had 2 weeks paternity leave and during that time he said it was a little odd but first baby so he didn’t know. She had only been told to breastfeed and she wasn’t producing. One night after my brother went back to work, he called me panicked. “Please can you go over. She’s crying and won’t touch the baby” (as in hold, feed, or care for) I left work and let myself in. She stayed in the bedroom crying and I took care of the baby until my brother got home.

I continued doing this until she decided to finally seek treatment. I still did it for months. I got them set up with a pediatrician, she was borderline failure to thrive. She couldn’t tolerate “normal” formula so we got her on a soy based one and she started to gain. I had permissions with her pediatrician and my brother and I attended them. Mom didn’t.

At about 6 months, with treatment working, she started getting better and taking care of the baby. In our case, I wasn’t there for my sister in law. She preferred to shut in her room. I took care of the baby and solely her. She’s much older now and doing very well, mom is a great mom. They aren’t having anymore kids because of the severity.

Help comes in all forms and until the time comes, none of us know what we’ll need. My mom had bad PPD with me. I have anxiety and we’ll see what I need when my baby comes next year.