alright. most of this story isn't necessarily "dumb shit while high", but the main event is a dumb thing while high, and... yeah, the rest of the dumb things were done while high. it's a decently long story.

this happened about a year and a bit ago, I would have been 15. i dont wanna promote teenage drug use or whatever, but it happened, and i'm not gonna lie about age, considering it's an important factor in the story. plus it's the internet, who gives a shit. this was also all written on my phone so excuse spelling errors and whatnot

a really good pal of mine, Yuri, goes to an art-centred high school. The music and arts programs are the main focus. as such, this school has a lot of those high-school teenage bands. specifically, they all speciize in weird stoner-psychadelic-grunge genres, and most suck. anyway, they all played various shows around the city, occasionally teaming up and performing together, but mostly were independant. one day, they decided to all band together and play a group show and put on their own music festival. imagine it - a two day, all night over night festival consisting only of shitty high school bands. after some planning and promoting, the first annual "Old Fort Festival" was planned. Yuri, at the time, played in three bands - a hard rock type band called Gyroid, a reggae band called The Peavees, and a stoner psychadelic band called The Haze. He was the drummer (and is very good). Both The Peavees and Gyroiid got stage time at this festival.

Anyway, two days full of tons of high-schoolers getting shittered on private property to bad music. what can go wrong?

Yuri invited me to go so I could see his shows, so i went. we were only going to stay the first night and go home after - we did'nt want to crash there, which was probably a smart move. as soon as I got there, the first thing i see are wasted teens moshing to some bad death metal band or something - and Yuri runs up to me asking me to have some scotchka (scotch and vodka - inspired by The Room. Anyone who's seen it knows whats up, we see it frequently - but thats a story for another time). What happened over the next hour and a bit can be easily congested to "substance abuse" - I drank a lot, and smoke a lot, basically.

Eventually, after Yuri's bands finished playing, i got a really bad case of the munchies - I had to eat , now. this was non negotiable. yuri felt the same so we both went to hunt down someone who could spare some snacks. eventually, we came across one of the event organizers, sitting behind a table near the stage, doing sound checks or something. for some reason, we asked her for snacks. conveniently, she replies with "yeah, I've got some sick homemade cookies here, if you want some". now the first thing that probably popped into your head was "oh no, they're laced with some shit". this experience taught me not to accept yummies from strangers. luckily, they were not laced with drugs, but rather peanut butter - of which I am very, very allergic. When I said "luckily", I didnt mean that, because taking drugged cookies could probably have resulted in a better outcome.

anyway. I take a bite of the cookie, and it hits me instantly - these are peanut butter cookies. don't eat them, pablo_montoya, dont - but I do. I have the munchies, and little in self control and judgement. I ate the whole cookie and a little bit more of a second - not good. After this, I proceded to go moshing again , but progressively, got more and more nauseous - very very powerfully. I eventually had to sit down somewhere and take a breather, but for some reason could not bring myself to throw up - i just had this perpetual nausea feeling. luckily, about this time, everyone else was burning out and we decided to head out and go home, but unluckily we all made the collective decision to walk home from the venue - which would be an over 4 hour walk through some of the sketchiest neighbourhoods in the city. and we were all drunk / high / on something else. but what could go wrong? we obviously saw no problem. so we set off on our fellowship to get to yuri's house, with me in tow on the brink of passing out from nausea and whatever allergic reactions i might have been afflicted with.

we walk about an hour, until we get to an under-construction shopping common complex - with lots of stores and lots of parking lots. We stopped for a rest in the parking lot of a rona or something, when someone who by this point had sobered up somewhat and said "we should call a taxi van". we all agreed, because our feet were tired, and we were all burned out to cinders. while a lot of this is hazy memory, I'll mention a very distinct tidbit I remember vividly - I was sitting on a parking curb, next to a guy named Connor. Connor does a lot of drugs - not something I look up to or would be fond of, but he does, and that's that. We are sitting on this curb, looking over at the view in front of us, which is a river valley , and across the valley is massive complex of refineries and industrial buildings. the kind with many blinking lights and tall smokestacks, sometimes spewing fire as they incinerate gasses or oil or whatever goes on inside. connor and I sat, watching the twinkly lights and billows of fire, and honestly it was a really pretty sight - a beautiful thing to see, despite it being the face of pollution and environmental destruction (or wealth, whatever your view). anyway, connor says to me" You see that light?" and he points somewhere. Fuck if I know where, there are so many lights, but he says it anyway. To humour him, i say Yeah, i see it. He looks at me, and says "Fuckin cool, bro" and fist pumps me. We sit for a few silent moments, until he points again, this time in some other direction, and repeats the question "You see that light"? You can guess where this is going. I agree, and he fist pumps me. This occurs endlessly until the taxi van arrives.

I pass out for the taxi van ride. Yuri wakes me up as we approach his house.

We get inside his basement, safe and sound, although I still feel vehemently sick. It's about five in the morning. Yuri wants to order a pizza from some 24 hour local pizza place, we all agree. However, in between the time of ordering and the time of pizza arrival, everyone but me and Yuri fell asleep. One guy in particular, Marco, fell asleep on the floor in front of the bathroom door - in a wat that if you open the door, the corner edge of the door will swing right into his neck / collar bone area. Anyway, pizza gets here, but me and yuri are too tired to eat it, so we leave it and go to sleep. I fall asleep on the floor in Yuri's room.

I slept for a bit for how long I'm not sure, until I woke up sharply. You know that feeling when you're about to throw up? You can feel it in your gut? The imminent "i have to go to the bathroom RIGHT THE FUCK NOW" feeling? that happened. so I run to yuri's bathroom, but - Marco is sleeping in front of it. Sorry Marco, but I need this - i rip open the door and it slams right into his neck / collar bone area. He gets up, screamz something very incoherent and aggressive, and starts throwing punches at me, accompanied by "fuck you's" and "what the fuck is wrong with you's" and the like. I shove him out of the way and enter the bathroom, but it's too late - Marco has taken too much time from what I had available. I throw up all over yuri's toilet, lid closed. Marco stares at me for a second, then whimpers this very sympathetic "i'm so fuckin sorry, man" then passes out on the floor again. i'm tired, I feel like shit, and I stare at this mess I've created, and i say fuck it - i close the door and go to bed, with the intention of cleaning it up first thing in the morning.

i wake up to yuri yelling at me to clean it up. I do this, it sucks.

we all gather around the living room, and someone says "i'm hungry". we all sit for a moment, and then Yuri's eyes light up.

"We have a fuckin pizza"!" he says.

We eat the pizza. It was delicous.

After this, everyone slowly went home, including me. And that was the Old Fort Fest night, where some of the dumbest thing's ive ever done while high occured. It's a very long story full of bad decision, and I apologize, but for those ive told the story to already, the feedback I get is that its a very entertaining story. so I hope you were entertained.