Prom season had just begun at my high school and with that came excessive and ridiculously extravagant promposing (prom + proposing). The halls in my high school were very narrow, the building was relatively small, and there were 1600 kids in the building. All you needed was one douche who decided he'd corner of a main portion of the hall so he could put posters spelling prom for his date or make a stage for themselves to ask to prevent literally hundreds of kids from getting to their lockers and class on time.
After a week of this bullshit, our vice principal got on the microphone at lunch and announced that pompous promposals are now not allowed, and anyone caught doing an excessive one would be given ten detentions. The subsequent collective sighs and boos of our class (every grade ate lunch together, Catholic school I guess) were drowned out by him yelling shut up, which we did because our Vice Principal was a former NYPD sergeant and one of the biggest and scariest guys in the building.
My friend Chris texts me the night of the banning asking me "Wouldn't it be funny if I promposed to our Vice Principal?" I said yeah but there's no way you won't pay for it. Chris, being the guy he is, took this as a challenge. I come into school the next morning to see he is not there. He comes in after a few minutes with a bouquet of tulips and a poem written out for our Vice Principal. He was fucking ready.
His first attempt to prompose involved asking the TA's in our school, who acted as the subordinates to our Vice Principal, if he could get the mic at lunch to ask our Vice Principal to prom. They in no way shape or form found this in any way funny and asked if he was "fucking insane." Disheartened, but not deterred Chris pressed on.
When he got back to us, we started brainstorming ways to get the lunchroom quiet. We then realized we could try to shush the cafeteria. We went to our friends across the lunchroom and said "Guys, at lunch, we're gonna give a signal to start quieting everyone down. Don't ask why, just do it." They agreed and we were set to go.
Once lunch came around, Chris was visibly nervous. Halfway through lunch, he still hadn't given the signal. We started calling him out and saying it's time, and whatever. Finally, our friend Matt goes "You pussy. You won't." That was what did it. All the fright in Chris's eyes vanished and he said "give the signal."
We gave the signal and everyone started shushing, and it was way more effective than any of us anticipated. Within 20 seconds, the lunchroom was dead fucking silent, there were only whispers about what the fuck was happening. The fright instantly returned to Chris, but he goes "now or never" and gets up. He stands and goes "Excuse me everyone, I have an announcement!" Our Vice Principal, who resides over all the lunches, starts walking over from the front of the cafeteria all the way towards the back where we are sitting. The TA's are fucking fuming they are so angry.
Chris unzips his jacket and pulls out the tulips and then starts saying this hysterical poem professing his love for our Vice Principal. With every stanza our Vice Principal neared him, and with every step, Chris gained confidence, accepting his fate and achieving his Destiny. Everyone is fucking dying. The cafeteria was going through a cycle of laughing and shushing so they can hear the rest of the poem
The moment our Vice Principal gets to our table, Chris yells "Your as badass as Jack Bauer, will you go to prom with me (Vice Principal's Name)." He extends the flowers to our Vice Principal and in his utter rage, which was only visible when he got to our table, he extends his arm to the exit of the cafeteria and Chris starts to walk out.
During the 30 seconds it took for Chris to leave the cafeteria and then some, every single person was on their feet giving him a standing ovation and Chris had the biggest shit eating grin on his face. He was suspended for a day, prevented from going back to lunch for the rest of our senior year, threatened with promises he will not go to prom and walk at our graduation ceremony, and was immortalized in our high school's history.