What happened to your best friend after high school?

So I've got a story that should probably be on a throwaway but whatever:

He went off to college, I stayed in the same town working the same job that he got me, I'd see him occasionally on breaks or holidays, talked with him online pretty much every day.

Then one summer we're working together and he seems even more depressed than usual. I ask him about it cause I'm really nosy and he's just gives some bullsnoot answer about wishing things could be that can't. I press him for more info and he starts telling me about how there is this guy (we'll call him K) he met online that he wishes he could be with but can't.

This itself is a huge shock because he'd only ever told me he was straight, and he was very religious (Lutheran) and thought homosexuality was a sin that would send you to hell. I ask why it couldn't work and he tells me it's because K already had a boyfriend, and his mother would never allow it, and distance, a bunch of reasons.

I being an absolute dolt say, "I had no idea you were open to being with other guys. Why don't you go out with me instead? I already love you." (I'm bi) I got a response of, "ew, no, gross" Needless to say I was pretty hurt.

Then as he's telling me more about him I learn that he already met K. He tells me (for some reason) that he gave him head and fooled around in the shower with him. Never mind the fact that K was willing to cheat on his boyfriend, or that my friend didn't mind that fact, I was more hurt from the rejection.

I ask my friend, "what makes K so much better than me? Why are you willing to date him and not me? Is it just that I'm not attractive?" And I receive a tale of how in his previous year of college he'd become near suicidally depressed and failed all his classes. That K was the only reason he didn't kill himself. I was shocked, and infuriated. How can I talk to you every day for 7-8 years and you aren't willing to share this kind of thing with me?

I kept working with him but suddenly we were fighting all the time. I just couldn't understand him anymore. I struggled to get him to connect to me, tried desperately to get him to spend time casually with me outside of work, or even message me on Skype/LoL. Eventually it seemed like things settled down a bit after a few fights, mostly with me crying and him just sitting there not knowing what to do.

So then I want to play LoL with my friend but he's constantly playing with K. I can only play with him if I play with K also. I try to be the bigger man, forget the past, and just be friendly with him so it doesn't look like I still hate him for being what I can't compare to for whatever reason.

At first it seems okay, until I start seeing what kind of person K is. He's a shameless flirt, and likes teasing everyone. I'm trying to carry a casual conversation with him asking more about him cause I'm nosy, and he sends me a link of him having sex with another guy, saying things such as, "like what you see?" I ask him, "what does your boyfriend think of this?" And he responds, "who do you think is filming?"

I was frankly appalled at K's personality. I'm not religious in the slightest but cheating is extremely taboo to me, and I learned that K and my friend were fooling around behind K's boyfriend's back, regardless of whatever pseudo-open relationship they might have had. I try to brush it off and ignore it, just to avoid conflict at this point.

Then K comes online super drunk one night, claims the only reason I'm friendly with him is to get at my friend, and deletes me. I didn't understand, I hadn't said anything mean I was thinking, even though I wanted to, and he just fucks it up anyway. What's worse is all I can think of is, "why does my friend like K and not me?"

Time passes and eventually I stop trying to contact my friend, and because he's not the type to ever message me first it's just radio silence for the longest time. Christmas comes and I see him again at work, but it's not a positive experience and he still refuses to meet me outside of work to celebrate the holiday.

Occasionally I'd try to rekindle things but having friends who don't talk to you on their own started bothering me more and more and I deleted everyone off Skype hoping someone would notice and message me out of concern. For the record I understand social tests like these are dumb, but it's kind of a moderate way for me to commit social suicide and see who comes to the funeral. No one did.

I tried making some friends since then but no one who messages me. It really hurts. I hate feeling like I'm not lovable or memorable. I made a friend on Reddit recently who I had fun playing games with but I haven't heard from him for almost two weeks now. I know people are busy and all but I've never been so busy I haven't had time to Skype someone telling them so when they inquire.

TLDR: Straight friend fooled around with gay guy, rejected me, and doesn't message me anymore.

/r/AskReddit Thread