3. What made you laugh the hardest in your entire life?

What made you laugh the hardest in your entire life?

To spare my husband the horror of going to get a haircut at the salon, I’ve bought him a beard & hair trimmer so he could take care of and style it how he wants to. Alas, that did not happen and when I saw him grow the entire planet’s fucking flora and fauna on his head I decided to groom him. I mean I groom my dog so it can’t be thaaat much harder, he just wants it short.

So here we are both in the bathroom and me giving directions and putting towels on his shoulders like I have any idea what I’m doing. He specifically says “not too short at first, just start with the biggest size and then gradually go down from there so you won’t fuck me up”. Meh fuck you dude, I know what I’m doing. So I slap that number 2 on and go to town.

First buzz - mm not bad, I’m actually so fucking good at this. Second buzz - my god I am a natural. Third buzz - ok maybe I leaned a little too much into that one, it’s cool though, I’ll go over the previous sides again and make it a little shorter to match. Fourth buzz on the previous sides - omg fuck me I leaned into this one and I can see his scalp a little bit too much. Also what do I do with the sideburns? Do I leave them long? What about this fucking cowlick that he has in the middle of the head? Oh and another one in the back. Oh oops I might’ve snipped your ear soz. God fucking damn it I did not know it is this complicated to just CUT SOME SHORT HAIR SHOTER. It doesn’t look that bad. Well maybe I wouldn’t pay money for this but hey, it is a very big convenience to have your wife cut your hair in the privacy of your own bathroom so don’t you dare dislike it

My husband was looking into his phone and not paying attention. His head being sort of above my eye level didn’t really give me the best view of his beautiful evenly grown hair. So after about half an hour I tell him I’m done and he can look in the mirror. He is usually a super chill guy and doesn’t really give a fuck about how he looks. The face he made when he saw himself was absolutely amazing. He started screaming in the bathroom KHALIAGIB1ST, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO??? I LOOK LIKE HITLER’S WET DREAM BUT WITH 5 TYPES OF FUCKING CANCER!!!!

At this point I was literally on the floor of the bathroom, crying from laughing and telling him to calm down which didn’t help. He didn’t let me cut his hair ever after.

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