Because of the fear that they eventually will realise that i'm not what they thought i was. Not because i've changed, but because i know people grow, evolve and may find that they have been fooling themselves. Who knows themself, really?

Because i tend to give it my all, be honest and and open, but somehow i have yet to find someone who speaks the same "language". Which makes me anxious, uncertain, and it will influence how i behave, the decisions i make.

It's discouraging and tiresome. I keep putting myself out there because there is no accaptable alternative, to me. But i don't know how much it is going to cost me and i don't know if it will be worth it, when i would look back on it at a later time. It will be another lesson, but at what cost?

So many doubts. I just can't seem to find a way to manoeuvre through all this without it picking away at my stability and sanity.