What made you suddenly lose interest in someone you were pursuing?

I assume you mean pursue romantically. This is gonna be an incredibly boring answer and that sounds kind of fun to talk about so here goes: the urge to pursue someone is usually enough for me to just completely avoid them as much as I can.

I have learned I cannot trust myself to see any red flags for people I suddenly urge to pursue romantically like that. I always feel like I'm a good judge of character for others with minimal interactions, but if I'm attracted to someone and want to pursue a relationship? Even when I know better and try to mitigate those blinders I am unsuccessful. If I have formed any kind of feelings for someone they can pretty easily lie to and manipulate me. Unfortunately, so far at least, anyone I feel that sudden infatuation for without knowing anything about them have all turned out to be pretty terrible people, and that also makes it easier to avoid them. Not that I am actually judging them based off of a feeling, because again I don't know them, but more like using those past experiences to more easily dismiss the urge. Plus I don't like the nausea/butterflies that come with the nervousness so I just try to not be around them.

If it can't be helped because we're co-workers or they're a client, I can better tolerate the feeling knowing that I have no desire to be romantically involved with my coworkers or clients.

Otherwise, I am just kind to everyone in general. I make friends when possible, and if the desire for a romantic relationship forms with someone I've gotten to know after awhile I will go from there, but it is a much different feeling than the urge to pursue them.

/r/AskReddit Thread