What is the most bullshit thing you have ever been taught?

Ahh the perils of being the son of a religious junkie. That's religious and a junkie, while also being a religious-junkie. Kind of the best of both worlds.

  • Santa is really the devil in disguise, trying to trick us all into worshiping a pagan holiday. You can tell because the words in Santa also spell Satan.

  • If you touch yourself, you'll have oily skin and everyone will know and laugh at you.

  • You shouldn't wash your hands with the soap of a gay man. You'll catch diseases.

  • If someone laughs at you, punch them in the face. They won't laugh anymore (did I mention he served time?)

  • You don't need to by shorts, just cut off a pair of jeans in the summer! This was the worst of all atrocities.

  • Black people are black because Kane killed Able.

  • Also, about black people, they all hate us. So it's okay to hate them back.

  • You can threaten someone as long as you attach a condition to it. "I'll kill you if ____" is perfectly fine.

  • Drugs are bad. I know I do it anyway, but they're bad. Don't do them, just watch me do them. They're bad. By the way don't steal my drugs you little cunt!

  • Trust my father, because god gave him insight. He was wandering in the desert once (during his runaway years) and had a near-death experience. He prayed for knowledge--insight into the world. TUHDUH vision yada yada illuminati.

  • Among those visions, everything in the world is decided in secret backroom deals, votes don't even count. So he doesn't have to feel bad about missing election day in a stuper.

  • Smoking in the same room with your kid is fine! Just because you can smell it doesn't mean you're inhaling it!

  • The earth is 6000 years old. Fossils were planted by the devil to trick us. Or they were moved there in the great flood. Or the science is wrong--carbon dating isn't real. Or all of the above why not!

  • Almost everyone in the world is going to hell. But we're not sure about the jews...

  • Vaccines are a scam. He didn't even think they caused autism, he just disagreed with the fundamental concept of a vaccine. Here's hoping I don't catch chicken pox as an adult...

  • Homeschool. Need I say more?

Lots of other shit too that I occasionally discover in life. Makes for good skepticism training.

/r/AskReddit Thread