Yeah but I have an extremely hard time recollecting them unless i get a panic attack and it flashes before my eyes like when I remembered this one.

I'll never forget when i tried to rob a cop car with a wrench by accident and stopped what i Thought was a taxi...

It was after a day of heavy drinking and iirc after around 30 really shitty pressed white xanax pellets and i was out walking with some girls and i wanted to fuck. I didn't have any money so i ws gonna, ironically, fix money for a taxi so we could get a taxi to my place, so I decided to stop the car that was approaching us in the dark winter street.

As i stood i the middle of the street waiting for the car to stop, waving the wrench at the car i didn't see the details of due to the lack of light and the fact that my glasses had been destroyed in a separate unrelated bartarded incident so i couldnt see shit the car all of a sudden stopped and two guys got out of the car.

I remembered thinking something lilr "Well this won't end well for them" and Boom! I saw that they were uniformed officers of the fucking law and not a scrawny taxidriver.

My friends later told me i yelled Fuuuuck and just threw the wrench where i stood and put my arms out so they could cuff me.

Last year i actually met that cop when i got busted for shoplifting. He wasn't as pleased as i was to meet him... "Remember me!?!?! You tried to rob me you dumb fuck!" And boom! He stripsearched me (illegally in front of two store clerks and his colleague and two rent-a-cops with bad attitudes). Twice!

Fun fact: at the trial for that and some other shit i can't remember what it was, the judge asked me "but lappnisse. Why did you try and rob a cruiser and not a store?" And i made everyone including my lawyer laugh when i explained that "aw cmon i thought it was a cab"

Fuck you to the people that has reminded me of that story through the years. That would be obscured in the depths of benzo blackout if y'all didn't exist haha.