"We can still be friends."

I might have been the one to say that to a girl I was breaking up with, and I did sort-of mean it so I'm not sure it counts. Not that we would hang out, but that we could remain on friendly terms each other. I guess it paid off when I started dating her sister and she was cool with it.

The most obvious lie anyone has ever told me was my former college roommate. The dude was an absolutely pathological liar. He'd lie about stupid stuff that didn't even have a point. Anyway, a bunch of us were at a military wedding in our uniforms and he saw that two of us had parachutist wings. He didn't have those, so he told us that he had gone to jump school but wasn't allowed to wear them because it was classified. (For the record - that is absolute, utter horse-crap). We knew he was lying so we decided to see how far he would stick with the obvious lie. This was in 1990 (which will be important).

We asked him, "When did you go?" He said he went in the summer of 1983, which was a bad call because we had both been there in the summer of 1983 and we knew he wasn't there when we were. So he changed his story and said it was 1989. So we asked him how it was possible to not know whether he had gone seven years prior or only a few months prior. No answer. So we asked him what company he was assigned to, and he said he was in Alpha Company. What he didn't know - because he was never there - was that at the time the companies in the Airborne Training Battalion were designated by numbers (41-45) rather than letters (Alpha - Delta). We just gave up after that.

One that might be even better was when he (an E-3 who probably worked in the kitchen but claimed he worked in Military Intelligence) told me (a Lieutenant at the time) that he was sent on a mission in an FB-111 to do a close fly-by of the Soviet aircraft carrier Kiev.jpeg) in the North Atlantic, and that they had buzzed the flight deck about 50 feet up.