what to do next...husband cheated

I'm really sorry man, that must hurt a lot. But if he knew you shared phones and still had those apps on there with those messages then that's pretty weird. If I was going to speculate wildly as an internet randomer I would imagine he's either riddled with guilt and a coward who wanted you to find out and end it so he didn't have to or he really just must be quite simple

Some people are cheaters. Maybe you can work it out with him based on the circumstances, but that's not for me to know. This is the problem with some people, they marry their perfect guy but even then they're not satisfied. Some people are just addicted to sex with new people and weak willed. I love sex with new people but have never cheated and don't see myself cheating either. When I'm in love I'm in love, and when I'm not I break it off before I cheat. Trust is important to me and is clearly important to you, and maybe you can get the trust back depending on the circumanstances. But if not you sound like you can find someone again, I just hope this doesn't give you trust issues in future relationships, because there are people out there who do enjoy sex with new people, but also have some self control and share your values. When I'm in love in love like I said; I can easily control my sexual appetite because of our commitment. I would never hurt someone I was in love with in such a way. And if the love fizzled out, then still staying true and not cheating while I'm in that relationship or marriage is important to me.

I don't know what to say man, people cheat for all sorts of reasons. Maybe he's a sex addict, maybe he needs validation, maybe he just didn't love you as much as you thought. Maybe he thought he could get away with it and have you too and is kind of a scum mag mentally. I don't get it and never have, it can really screw a person up. I just hope you find someone who you can trust in future. Good luck

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