Will you entertain my observations?

My guess is that you're a lot like me. You're a problem drinker, aren't you?

You're not an alcoholic. But you like to binge drink, and you binge drink often enough that it's a cause for concern. You know it's a problem, you know it's unhealthy, but you'll be damned if you don't like it.

See, you're probably doing exactly what I do. You try to quit for awhile, until you feel like you've earned drinking one night, am I right?

You've done well for a while, but now that you've had your cool down, you deserve to have a drinks, but it's only one night. But then you're back into the habit of drinking heavily every weekend, sometimes twice a week.

In the past you have probably gotten drunk because:

A) You were bored. B) Were stressed out about something C) Felt like purging some negative emotions. D) Because you felt like numbing yourself a little. E) Because you loosen up after a few drinks and less socially awkward. F) Because you were using it as a reward.

I'm sure most people have done at least a few those... But you... You've probably done most, if not all of those - and not occasionally - but I'll bet at least 1/2 of the times you binge drink, it's for one of those reasons, or a couple others within that ballpark.

You know what helped me? Realizing that there is no such thing as a "final sendoff" for a bad habit when you're trying to force the occasion. It also helped me to realize that using alcohol as a rewards makes me feel entitled to it when I do something I feel is reward worthy.

What you need is to find something else you can enjoy in the place of alcohol, and use it as a substitute reward.

Also, one night when you're feeling particularly anxious about your habit, you should grab a piece of paper and write down every reason that your problem worries you, and why you want to stop. Then you can go ahead and stick that in your wallet. The next time you're rubber necking a liquor store, why don't you pull that little note out and remind yourself about the bigger picture.

If you're like me, your problem isn't addiction. Your problem is that you are not a tactician. Your problem is that you don't recognize the environmental triggers you take as cues for drinking, and you don't know how to replace the void stopping creates in your life. If you can figure all that stuff out, you can figure out how to end your habit for good.