For me it's usually after we've had sex a few times and we're in a relationship. None of my kinks are essential to my long term sexual fulfillment or happiness and I have trouble understanding someone who would forgo an otherwise solid, healthy relationship in favor of a specific kink. For me, sex is fun but in a relationship, its primary purpose is to solidify a bond between me and my partner and the whole exercise is flexible, approached as a team and with compromise and mutual pleasure in mind. In other words, I don't have anything outside of basic vanilla sex that I'd not be willing to let go of if my partner didn't want to do it. So I don't care when we discuss it from my end but I suppose if my partner had a lot of specific needs/desires, I'd want to know about them fairly early if they were dealbreakers for them. I'm GGG but I'm not without limits and I'm not really into a relationship with someone who is uninterested in compromising their specific desires for their partner (as I am).

In other words, if you have a lot of dealbreaker, specific kinks, tell me early so I can bail. I don't and I don't want a partner who does either. If you're interested in exploring but aren't dead set on an all or nothing scenario, let's talk after we've had a bit of time to settle in.