The first time I attempted suicide was when I was around 9 years old after my sister unknowingly sexually assaulted me. We were just playing around in the pool and she knew being naked made me uncomfortable and she was just trying to piss me off. She had skinny dipped plenty of times before, but she kept trying to grab me and pull me against her. When she grabbed my foot and it ended up somewhere a little too personal, something inside me broke. After she went inside I sat on the steps of the pool trying to drown myself by breathing in water. 10 years later I’m still here, and I never brought it up again, I basically idolize my sister but this still haunts me from time to time. I have no clue if she remembers this or not, if she does it probably haunts her too, since she really didn’t know better. This is my first time ever mentioning this to anyone at all.