This one time, I was talking to my uncle, and masturbation came up. I'd told him I dont do that because I feel really guilty afterwards. Also, my girlfriend hated it so I'd told her i would refrain from it. This dude, I kid you not, laughs aloud and immediately has an expression of utter disgust and says
"Aren't you ashamed of yourself? It's natural, things like these are natural. Why are you being so unnatural...are you gay?" With a fairly serious expression.
I couldn't say anything, nor burst out laughing so said goodnight and went to my room and laughed it the heck out. Still makes me giggle to date especially cuz he doesn't even remember the conversation being tipsy as he was