I was living under the impression I was a mistake. My mother told me as much that if it wasn't for me she would have completed her studies and it my fault we lived in poverty. Turns out she was talking nonsense. I cut contact years ago. But when I mentioned to my auntie recently about the comments I'd get. She was shocked and told me 'your mum wanted you, love being the centre of attention when pregnant and she had planned on starting a family' Still not sure if I 100% believe that, since my mother was 16 at the time and had watched all her sisters be forced into arranged marriages. I see it as maybe I was her escape plan. But interesting to have that insight from another member of the family.