What is your childhood memory that you thought was normal but realized it was traumatic later in your life?

My parents were physically and emotionally abusive, my dad more than my mom. I have an anxiety disorder and growing up I would have panic attacks and get frantic. My dad would put me in choke holds, threaten to throw me down the stairs, or hit me in order to get me to calm down. Sometimes they’d take all my furniture out of my room, including the decorations. And anytime I tried to sneak a poster back in they’d tell me I didn’t deserve nice things. One time I made myself sick eating a pack of kraft singles when I was 10 because my dad wouldn’t let me eat that day, and that’s all I could sneak up to my room. Of course it made it worse. I used to have panic attacks and slam my head against walls because I thought that’s how the anxiety attacks stopped. My self esteem was shot growing up, and my dad told me constantly “just drop out of college now, you’re too stupid, you’ll never make it. You’re only ever going to work in a factory or some dead end job. Just give up now because you’ll fail.” It’ll take me 7 years to get a 4 year degree just because I failed so many classes. My self esteem and confidence are non existent. I don’t know why my little sister was never punished like I was.

/r/AskReddit Thread