Because of my nmom I've been homeless a few times. The worst of which was when my boyfriend and I were having trouble, she decided to let me stay with her. I was also 7 months pregnant, working two jobs. Literally 90 hours a week. Literally. You might ask, how does one work 90 hours a week? I was a caregiver for elderly. Many jobs are available from the 7pm to 7 shift since people don't want to work that shift. I was occasionally allowed to sleep after midnight till about 5 am, when my current had a bell to ring me if she needed to go to the bathroom, but at 7 months pregnant, you can't really sleep anyway because everything is agonizing at that point. I also held a job as a hostess at this restaurant which I worked at full time, which was actually slightly better pay. (Ps, caregivers don't get overtime pay. Wtf.) I digress.
After nine days of being distantly harassed, in between shifts where I had an opportunity to sleep 3 full hours, I climbed in her bed (I didn't have a room, it was an intentionally temporary situation.) She told me to wake up. In my exhaustion I laid there telling her I'd just got back from a 12 hour shift, still in scrubs, hoping she would relent, but of course, she didn't. She threatened to throw cold water on me. I climbed out of bed so we could talk about her feelings about how I'm not caring enough about her feelings... I start to get some morning sickness and prepare some food I bought. I had bought all the food in the fridge... when my ndad comes in to tell me I'm not allowed to eat their food. My parents are divorced but still living together, and have only each other to destroy until they have a common enemy. That was me. He literally takes the whole plate away. I'm ready to vomit, but in my fury, throw the other sandwich I'm trying to eat, ready to bite someone's head off. He grabs my new phone I'm still paying on, and smashes it in to the corner of the table.
Visibly shaken and barefoot, I stand outside in the cold with a cordless landline to call the cops while my ndad is making faces at me to taunt me through the glass door I'm now locked out of. The cops come, one asks me if I want to press charges. The other tells me I need to be more grateful to my parents, not understanding I'm not the deadbeat in this situation. Being knocked up and crashing with your parents I guess makes you vulnerable to stereotyping...
I dont press charges and they hold my unborn childs belongings hostage until I retrieve my much older brother to escort me. He has nothing to do with them and my ndad is scared of him, being a hardened war veteran and him being an abusive coward who apparently preys on pregnant young family members..
I slept in my car the first night, a coworker the second, then my old landlord took me in when I cried begging for my apartment keys so I could get my stuff. (Boyfriend hadn't paid the rent.)
I continued working like crazy and paid up a year on my own place, and decided to join the Air force since I couldn't afford college.
The fucked up part is that wasn't even the last straw. It wasn't until about 8 months ago I asked my mom if she would watch my dog until I got out of basic training. My boyfriend and now husband and son were staying with his family while I went to basic, so we could save money and make it through the separation a little easier. She was jealous that his parents were obviously better than my own, begging to help. So since I needed it with my dog (I should mention my husband got me our dog when I miscarried our first child) I asked. She insisted I pay her, so I did. Then I paid for his dog food, and her other four dogs food. Three days later she wrote me a very nasty email about how I abandoned my dig and she was selling him. I realized then I could never be friends with her, or make her see how irrational she was. I was having anxiety all the time about her calling to the point of panic attacks. I wrote her an email saying I was calling the cops, that she couldn't legally give my dog away. I got him back.. and for weeks she wrote me about what a shitty self centered daughter I was, how I betrayed her. That was it. I deleted my email of 14 years, changed my phone number, sold my car, and moved.
She later called my husbands mothers work looking for me. MIL simply said "it's not my place to tell you how they're doing." That was it.
I wonder if she ever things about the moments she's missing with her grandson. He's beautiful and amazing. The sad part is I.know she's not. She still thinks I'm a piece of shit and I know she things she's justified. I don't miss her. Or my ndad, who I was never close with anyway.
Tldr; my nmom made me homeless when I was pregnant and I tried to forgive her. But then she stole my dog and tried to sell him while I was leaving for basic training. Got him back. Fuck dat bitch.