What's a bad thing everyone should experience once? NSFW

Bah. I've definitely been there. Never in the 'overqualified' sense, but you can get around that.

The job hunt is just like the dating world, but arguably somewhat easier, since dating is heavily reliant on what you look like, which you can't change too much.

In the job world -- they literally just see what you put right in front of them. Not that I recommend it, but in theory you can simply "lie" and get a job next week.

Anyway, here's some job hunting tips during my 2010-holy-fuck-recession job hunt with little experience and a "political science" degree, highly correlated with the online dating world:

  1. It's a number game. If you're serious about finding a job you should be firing off 5-10 resumes a day. Most all places probably post their listings online. The job aggregator sites are good for this, especially some like careerbuilder where you can simply submit your documents and not spend 15 minutes filling out some "legacy utter crap" application interface.

  2. You need a cover letter, of course. If it's a direct email, the "email" should be the cover letter. What should be in the cover letter? Well, it should be a one-pager that basically SELLS YOU. You list your top features and selling points and why you are perfect for this goddamned job. Review some Bowflex commercials. Shit like this. People want a list of detailed features shotgunned at them, not flowery prose or "English lit" essays. There can be some overlap with the resume. But possibly more abstractions that you couldn't fit on the resume somehow (like you won a math contest or did this or that).

Basically the resume is the official 'product specs' and the cover letter is more like the copywriter selling you to click 'Buy Now' on the website.

  1. Mad libs. Again, like dating, it's numbers. You can't spend more than 5 minutes on each application. It's a waste of time. Investing "more customized" time has very poor, if not zero, ROI anyway. Best strategy is to do this "mad libs". You basically have 10-12 paragraphs about different bullshit selling points about yourself being super-Awesome. Depending on the job requirements (which you should largely feed back to them as meeting them all) ... you pick 3-4 of your 'selling point' paragraphs and put them in your Cover Letter.

The first few lines of the cover letter should be why you want to work there (complete bullshit of course, you want $$$).

Here I'll do an example.

I've very interested in working at a leading/ preeminent/ growing (small/ start-up/ global) (supermaket/ i-banking/ hospital/ CPG/ technology) company such as (Bimbo Corporation).

The opportunities to work with (cutting edge techology) and learn more about (bananas) and great potential for growth+development really excites me. (note last point is completely generic to all jobs on Earth, for example)

My example is half-assed since I cooked it in 30 seconds. You come up with ONE mad-libs that is half generic cold read, half fill-in something in 10 seconds. And the companies believe you CARE about them. You REALLY care! But if a robot auto-files your resume in the garbage can because their hiring process sucks ass, you only lost 5 minutes! Hooray!

/r/AskReddit Thread Parent