That I needed help. I was at uni studying something that I was good at in school and felt like it was expected of me to do, but I hated. Doing it for the wrong reasons and it being an intense subject, I ended up failing and developing depression and everything was falling apart. I'd never not been able to cope before. It took ending up stood outside A&E at midnight crying because I was sure I was going to end it for me to admit I wasn't ok. I think the depression was there already and everything else just made it worse. Now I've been on medication longer than I haven't, and don't think I'll ever be without. Second hardest thing is admitting that I am incapable of achieving any of my ambitions or goals anymore.