Months and months ago, there was a "reorganization" in the company. My boss got laid off, making a dude I called "Creepy Boss" my boss.
The day of the lay off was pretty stressful. They put us all in a room at 9 a.m. and basically said "some of you are getting fired in the next hour." There was no way to know if it was going to be you. You just had a meeting some time between 9 and 10 and you got the news.
At my meeting, I showed up totally prepared to be fired. Obviously, I wasn't. Creepy Boss told me that my boss was the one to go and that he'd been totally surprised. I joked that I am always prepared to go.
I even joked that I had heard some great advice - leave a heavy object at your desk just in case you get fired so that your boss has to move this annoying heavy object when you're gone.
Creepy Boss had one better: Leave a box of confetti at your desk so that after you're fired, your boss picks up the box and has confetti fly everywhere that they now have to clean up.
We had a pretty good laugh about that idea.
Many months later, I had a new boss, a person I called "Idiot Boss."
I ate oatmeal every morning. When the box was empty, I turned it upside down and set it on my desk.
And every day
EVERY
DAY
When she made me lose my god damn mind, I took a piece of paper and slowly, methodically tore it strip-by-strip into tiny, tiny, tiny little pieces that all went into the box.
Day
after
day
after
day
I quit on a Thursday. On Friday (according to an eye witness report), Creepy Boss took it upon himself to clean up my cubicle. This is something he proudly told me he does for every employee who leaves.
According to the witness, he found the oatmeal box. He picked it up.
And confetti went everywhere.
He was reported as looking "angry, but not surprised."