Getting lost in the dark wilderness while high as fuck on mushrooms. Went out camping on this secluded lake in Northern Ontario with a few friends for a week, a few summers back.
We camped ourselves out on a point and had an absolutely gigantic national park behind us to explore. Because it was the wilderness and we were roughing it, we had to be careful of the wildlife(wolves/bears/alldatshit). So we had to tie all our food up in the trees, and we shat/peed hella far away as well.
So it was getting dark and we decided to chew up these mushrooms that we were saving for this special occasion. What better time than to chew them just as the stars are coming out and we have a perfect view of the Milky Way? Right.
We get them down, and we go sit out on the point and stargaze as they start to kick in. About an hour and half passes and I gotta take a shit. The nearest latrine is like 10 hockey rink-lengths away, so I grab my flashlight and hastily plan out my journey.
At this point I'm seeing open-eyed-visuals(oev's) because it's so dark out my mind can't even interpret it. So I'm seein' fuckin' mayan symbols and patterns flashing all over the place in front of my eyes. Pretty cool and all. Then I turn on the flashlight.
The flashlight, and the ability to create light at the flick of a switch tripped me the fuck out. I pondered that whole situation for what felt like an eternity. Just flicking it off and on, pondering. I eventually got out of that state of mind, due to the fact that it felt like my stomach was about to be forced out of my asshole. So I perked back up and started to make the journey.
As I got about 20 feet away I flicked the lights on my friends and let them know what I was doing. They didn't give a fuck, 'cause Milky Way beautifulness. So I go on my merry way. Off in my own fucking world, bobbin' my head, thinkin' about some crazy shit, when I remembered how awesome light was.
Get about half way there and I started tampering with the flashlight again. I'd turn it off, take a few steps, turn it back on again. Repeat. After a couple minutes of this, I started tossing and spinning the flashlight in my hand. Cuz it was neat and shit.
Then only by a stroke of sheer retardation, I fumble it. It bounces off my fingertips and I hear its battery button click as it falls to the ground. No light. Absolute darkness.
I panicked. I panicked HARD. I started seeing figures of clowns and faces laughing at me in the darkness. I freaked the fuck out. I got down on my hands and knees but I was too far out of it to even process where the flashlight might've landed. I wanted to scream, but something in my head kept telling me that if I did it would only attract bears/wolves/nasty things. My butthole puckered so tight, whatever was in my colon would've been pressed into a single diamond.
I temporarily gathered myself together for a few brief moments to get back up off of pine needle infested forest floor. The OEVs just got more intense and I started hearing sounds. It was a true hallucination. The laughing clowns had morphed into visions of Native Americans and running coyotes. I took this as a sign that I should just start running.
I looked up through the trees and at the stars above, and looked back down to restore at least SOME night time vision. And I ran like a motherfucker. Only to be felled once more by a sizable rock planted in the ground. Taking the ground face first I tumbled with enough velocity to crack a few branches. Also screaming involuntarily(ok, maybe a little bit voluntarily, 2spooky4me).
Needless to say, my mates showed up a couple minutes later with their flashlights. They calmed me down, and we had a good laugh about it the morning after. But that trip was pretty ruined for me after that.
The sky did look amazing though.