Had to make a throwaway account because my brother, one of the victims of this story, knows my actual reddit account and this is one I'm taking to the grave. I'll keep it brief. In high school gym class, as a freshman, I got in a little scuffle with a junior named Rich who was captain of the basketball team and he knew it. I couldn't win the scuffle but I wasn't going down without revenge. After class all the dudes were up in the locker room showering and I sure as hell wasn't going in the showers when Rich and his cronies thought I was cruisin for a bruisin. As I looked at the array of small cubic lockers outside of the shower it dawned on me that I really had to pee. It also dawned on me that I knew where Rich's locker was - top row, middle. There was a bench in front of the locker array and in that brief moment of time I decided it would be a great idea to fire my pee stream straight into Rich's locker all over all of his clothes and then gtfo of there. Since he was showering, both his regular day clothes AND his gym clothes were in there. So I stood up on my tip toes on that bench, opened Rich's locker door, and fired a mean stream straight inside. It was thrilling - at any moment anyone could emerge from the showers and catch me in the act - and it seemed like this stream would never end. Really, it was probably the most I've ever pissed in my life. Anyway, for whatever reason, I had been operating under the assumption that each of these individual lockers was water tight. Welp, far from it. My massive piss puddle permeated through Rich's locker, sideways and downwards and absolutely soaked every guy's clothes thoroughly in piss. Some even trickled out and down to the floor to the point where, as I was leaving the locker room, I heard someone come back to the lockers and yell "wtf, someone pissed on the floor!" As it turned out, the pee had reached almost that entire locker array and everybody's clothes were just sloshed with my piss. I can't even describe the amount of anger in the room. When I realized what happened, sure I felt bad, but I also realized that as the one guy without piss on my clothes I was an obvious suspect. So i went to the nurse and faked a stomach ache to get sent home before anyone could notice that I was untouched by the pee. My parents will never, ever, find out why I went home early that day.