I got a projector recently and i was telling my friend how much i was enjoying the extra sense of depth it gives everything and things seem so much realer when they're happening in real physical space rather than in a tiny little box... so he says to me 'ayekid, when I first got my projector I was crazy for everything being the right size, just feels much realer aye?' but then he says that's no the best bit though, 'I just got a new projector, stolen aye but still cost a packet right, it's fucking mental, come and have a look...' So he takes me to his garage and one wall is totally clear right and there's this massive fucking projector on the other wall. it's a double garage so it's got a bit of room to throw right, do i'm not really thinking too much of it it right? i've been to the cinema,aye? so i just sit down and start rolling up a joint because i figure while we're down there may as well right, but then i'm just bringin it upto my lips to lick it when he flicks the power on and there's this big white flash i thought were gonna burn my eyes out but then they start to adjust and i see his big white wall is now covered by a giant fanny - a massive wet fanny with it's lips hanging open and a big six foot bubble of grool running outa her. fucking mad cat. so he says to me 'grand aye?' and i'm just like 'aye grand..' and he clicks ona the next image and it's another fannys, it's fucking massive and gaping and big enough you could walk into the things! like i had me head in a plenty of fannies right, i've seen them close up from every angle right but this wasn' like that, it wasn' that i was close up it was a fucking giant fanny that'd swallow me up before i could fuck it. mad stuff, real mad stuff. and there were more, fanny after fanny after fanny he just kept clicking though and i felt like i was like a wee little Gary Conway in land of the giants like, but with big sticky fannys. So I says to him 'aye this is grand, real grand' but he started to get all agro, started saying i didn't understand and he started going on about how it's a transformative experience and all this like it were the vagina monologues or some shite so anyway he says 'maybe you just need some time alone with it.' and he goes and he locks the door and i'm like what the fuck man? but i've got weed and it's warm so what whever i sat and have a smoke and wait for him to chill out and i'm watching this slideshow of gigantic wet fannies and I start thinking to myself that it'd be real nice to be able to shrink right down and proper explore a fanny like, like this one had a clit the size of my head and i ws thinking about stroking and rubbing it when he opened the door and says 'fucking ell put your fucking cocking away you fucking what the fucking?' but i was already on that point and spraying my load onto the floor, he just turned around and went back up the stairs calling me a fucking mess and all this shite.