What's your "I stuck my dick in crazy" story?

I was 19 and got a job bartending in a fancy restaurant, I didn't have much experience so all the other bartenders showed me how to make the cocktails and taught me about the wines etc. One of them was a girl, maybe 7/10 hotness and was only a year older than me, but for the first few months I thought she was at least 22/23 and she thought I was 18. Anyways, we had sexual tension for ages, figured out we were only a year apart in age, and eventually most of the other bartenders had quit and it would be her and I plus a few less experienced peeps running the bar together 5 nights a week, and I invited her out for my birthday weekend at a rave club in the city with all my other friends plus one or two others from work. We hooked up that night, both fucked up on ecstasy, didn't end up going home together coz I wanted to go back to my place and smoke heaps of weed with my Bois coz I was chewing my face off.

I started going to her place after work (11pm/12am usually), would smash her and usually boot at like 2am coz she'd get all weird. Sometimes she would just blatantly start arguments for no reason, her ex bf was a crack dealer who she had a restraining order on (or so she claimed), so fair to say this bitch was crazy. But she had a fat ass and I was blinded by the pussy. The most cooked part of the whole situation was that her (single/nice but not rootable) Mother, who hated all men, also worked with us at the restaurant as a waitress. Anyways, I'd go over most nights, her Mum would be all about it, bringing us chocolate bars and shit from the servo lol and whatever. So I'm basically seeing this chick right? Wasn't messing with anyone else, she's always asking me if I wanna be with her and shit, but 'wasnt ready' or something along those lines. Basically stringing me along but I was young and convinced I'd get her in the end.

One day she asks if I can get her some ecstasy for her birthday, basically begging me. I said I didn't want to, she said nobody else could get them for her, so I ended up getting 4 pills, and on my lunch break (she had the weekend off for her bday) I drive over to her place and leave them in a container on the tyre of her parked car. Go back to work, finish my 14 hour shift at midnight, pick up two of my friends, and go home and start smoking weed. Bare in mind I had 1 point on my license at the time due to speeding. As soon as I get stoned, she texts me freaking out saying she's ODing, not really making sense in her texts, and asking me what the fuck have I sold her. She says she needs me to pick her up coz she's freaking out and thinks she's dying. "Omg wtf have U sold me I'm dying" etc.

I drive to the city, 45 mins from home, get there around 3am. Walk into a petrol station, grab 3 bottles of water for her and her friends, and as I walk up to the club expecting to see her fucking half dead, she's sitting on some dudes lap with her two thot friends. "Omg heeey meet some dudes name we just met we're gonna go to some festival next month". I'm standing there trying not to lose my shit like what the actual fuck. Her friend goes to me "omg you're way better looking than she said you were". Thanks. Then she (friend) goes "thank you so much for picking us up, I paid for the taxi in and crazy bitch said she'd cover the lift home. So it dawns on me that she told me she was overdosing so that she could get a lift home.

Instead of leaving like I should have, I felt like I owed her mother who was nice to me to get her home so I'm like let's fucking go and start heading for my car in a huff. Crazy bitch picks up that I've clued on to the sitch, starts going off on me for no reason and saying 'im not getting in your car' while her friends are like 'wtf are U doing'. I end up driving them back to her place, the whole drive there this bitch is throwing shit at me, coins, her cards, and then she says "I'll call my mum and tell her where I got those pills." So I'm like fuck yeah let's do it I'll call her right now, grabbed her phone and went to call her Mum and she's like ... No.

Anyway, sorry for the ramble, there's so much more to that story lol but I'll leave it there, ended up going to sleep with like 3 hours before work the next day, during which her mum was like to me "I don't know what you did to piss her off so much but if you just apologize it will be alright" and I was like "thank you but I don't know what you heard, I've got nothing to apologize for". AND THE KICKER was that she had a boyfriend the entire time, hence why she would be all weird after we fucked and trying to get me out of her house after work. Half the time the boyfriend would come round after I'd left, and her Mum and sisters never told me (or him). Ended up meeting him once at a work drinks thing shortly after that night, I'd slept with her the night before, she'd started an argument so she could drop the bomb of "I have a boyfriend and he's coming tomorrow night", I got blind drunk, ridiculed him Infront of everybody without mentioning I was sleeping with his girlfriend, he was probably just like who tf is this guy and why is he being such a dick to me.

They're engaged now

/r/AskMen Thread