When I was laughed at and was told that it would take millions (of money) to be an astronaut by one of the staff that sponsors my schooling.

I was around nine years old and loved reading about celestial bodies and was dreaming of exploring the space, naming an asteroid and be the first astronaut from my country. I loved looking at the stars and moon, pointing out constellations and keeping track of the moon phases. I was serious about it, I knew japan has a space program and was rooting for it. It will take lots of years but I didn't care.

Until it was laughed at and was advised to pick something I'm good at, based from my grades and preferences. So I picked accountant, mathematician and artist; something "realistic". But I know that is not the answer to the question "What do you want to become?"

After that, I went home feeling really down for the first time in my life. I felt reality hit me like bricks raining on me as I walk home. Never felt so poor, so unprivileged and so discouraged in my life. I started questioning everything in life after that. If an enthusiastic dreamer like me can't get what I want to do in my life, what's the point of everything?

My perspective about life started to get dark. I stopped smiling. Everything after that incident seemed nothing. Everything is now just something to get by, but not what I want. And I can't do anything about it, especially that even the adults can't help me.

I was a dreamer, but my dreams were crushed by reality. Life is so unfair.

That's the first time I got depressed.