I understand completely how hard it is to hand over a baby to strangers. The point is that it’s not just her baby. You say “my baby” but it takes two. I video called her the first two visits. Always send pictures. I have always said I know how hard this is in her. I’ve told her repeatedly how much I appreciate what’s come to be between us. The issue is playing all of those games, and then pulling the rug. We talked about her chilling out from the hormone changes. We talked about breastfeeding schedules and picked out bottles together for what would be the best transition. We coordinated pacifiers. I bought 4 different types of diapers to give her to keep trying ones until we found one that didn’t cause a rash. I called and checked on her and the baby everyday after I found out I had Covid. She met our other son and he gave her a nickname. She offered to paint with him as she’s a painter. She said she wanted to move here close to us. We were even going to help pay her deposit so she could.

She told me many times, “I really need you guys and I know that” “This isn’t doable on my own”.. I’ve never said one nasty thing to her. Even when she took jabs at me the first time I talked to her. I love this baby so much it brings me tears. Our entire circle and family consider him and refer to him as mine. As his mom. She built up our hopes and mine and then yanked the ground out.