Well around June 2013 my family and I were constantly harassed and attacked by a gang in our own home, it lasted about a month. It's a long story but it started with one of them being arrested outside of our house, after that they would throw bricks at our house, smash windows, light fires. At one point they kidnapped our dog, but he was found and brought back to us.

I specifically remember one night sitting in a chair while it was all happening and just "spacing out" like a robot that was switched off, I just stared at a wall in the dark. It wasn't DP/DR it was different, like I was just a shell. After we moved I was fine, it was like nothing happened. I was a little agoraphobic and anxious but it was manageable and at the start of this year I was a bit depressed but ultimately fine.

April of this year I lost my job, my anxiety started to increase, around late June or July I was prescribed lexapro and valium after being on Xanax 0.25mg for 2 weeks. I was fine for one afternoon and then had the worst panic attack of my life, 6 days constantly, I've been like this since. I'm extremely certain the lexapro and valium caused this but I've been to 6 different doctors and they all say otherwise. I was anxious but nowhere near this bad before. I don't think it's a coincidence that I have a very bad panic attack the day after switching to a new medication.

And if that incident in 2013 had anything to do with it, I don't know why it was such a delayed reaction. I was bullied a lot as a kid and I wasn't close with my dad, but I've mostly forgotten about those things. 2012 I also had a bad panic attack after smoking a lot of weed, but again I was perfectly fine after it. I doubt those things would impact me at all.

Luckily I've been "back to normal" here and there since, it'll last a week sometimes only a day of relief. I'm currently in the worst of it right now, this past week - I'm hoping it'll all pass once the holidays are over.