Who is the worst "attention whore" you've come across?

My husband. He wears so much cologne if I lose him in a store I can follow the scent trail. He honks instead of waving. In a very hot and sunny region, he refuses to tint his windows because people won't see how pretty he is. He talks loud, yells at friends 10 yards before we are close enough for normal speech. He makes a noise when he yawns. When he sneezes the cat jumps 3 feet straight up. He makes funny comments to random strangers, and his wit is very quick so it's like he's strutting around with a quiver full of quips. If anyone makes eye contact with him, he talks and he has hundreds of hilarious stories about the most random things. He talks to kids. He talks to babies. He answers his phone in stores. He likes to show up a little late and make a big entrance. If he has to carry something heavy, he heaves it up to his shoulder like a lumber jack. He stands with his feet spread 3 feet apart and gestures wildly when talking.

 

Everyone absolutely loves him and his phone rings all day and all night. He leaves strangers smiling. He's the first choice for every golf foursomes, first choice for every beer-league softball game. Invited to every party. In small doses he is the funniest, most gregarious man you'll run into.

 

I love that man but goddamn he's exhausting.

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