Sorry to be the one to tell you this, but the purpose of treatment is to save someone's life. Anorexia is fatal, you must gain weight or eventually you will die of starvation/heart failure/etc. If you've been eating under your tdee for 1.5 years and didn't start out at 40%+ body fat, it's pretty much impossible for you to be obese so that's 100% in your head. Embrace the therapy and treatment and try to get your body to a safe weight. Obese people are not typically in treatment for anorexia, they're in treatment for compulsive eating where they can't stop binging. Totally different thing but also a deadly ED. Connect with some recovered anorexics ASAP! It will make this less scary. Praying for you.