I have tried getting into composing music and stuff. I'm not good at thinking of melodies, and honestly don't even know where to start when I look at a DAW. I strongly suspect ADHD within me, which might be yet another mental barricade from these things.

Artists don't usually have to force themselves to do what they love, I tried that stuff earlier this year. If anything, it just made me even more daunted by the process.

Every now and then I'll feel a rare twinge inside to draw something, but at the same time I'm so diluted by unutilized ambition and intimidation from the years of work it'd take to get somewhere. It feels like something's seriously wrong with me in the head, and I don't even know how to go about tackling that issue either.