I used to pray a driver would fall asleep and ram into me or drunk driver would kill me until I got the pain greatly reduced. I still have a headache 24 hours a day 7 days a week every single day I'm alive and awake, but the base level pain has been greatly brought down and the spikes to 10/10 I wish I was dying headaches have greatly decreased.

Physical therapy plus coming off all my medications and started new ones helped but eventually I got off the new ones and still have improved pain control.

I know this was vague but my only point is this - I've been in your shoes wishing something would end my misery because I didn't want to kill myself.

I know you don't want to hear this, but you need to know it can get better. I can't promise it will, but I can tell you you shouldn't lose hope. Not yet.