lmao. No, actually. Lets roll with this:

Please inform me on what would be your exact attempts to de-escalate the conflict of a guy breaking into your house. "Hey, you better get outta here, you ruffian! Or I'll have the constable called and you'll be in for a proper walloping by way of the judiciary system!" Oh wait I have another. "Sir! Remove yourself from my property! You must have not known it was against the law so I am informing you now! What you are doing is illegal!"

Or are you going to pretend like you're a badass and say something like "well all I'd need is a bat or my fists, he'd be in trouble." Hell yes brother, you are smart as hell.