I don't think you actually tried. I think you dipped your toe in and got scared. I think it's because a fetish is not a comfortable subject. I have found someone who shares my fetish and is supportive of me. However, over the past coupe of weeks I've found he is not as supportive as I want him to be. But I don't have a lot to bring to a relationship right now. I expressed that he missed my birthday and I didn't feel like he responded in a way that satisfied me. I don't think it's reasonable for someone to remember your birthday. I don't remember anyones birthday. If someone tells you that you missed their birthday... I think it warranted more thought than he put in to it. It's not like. He is usually very attentive and caring. I don't have a lot of experience in the dating area. It hurt my feelings a lot because he said he loved me twice first. He doesn't say it anymore. I know what it means. It's hard to accept.