I have one of the most boring jobs in the solar system. I'm a Bounder.
See, in old science fiction, many authors would come up with some kind of handwavium to allow transluminal velocities to be reached. The truth of the matter is far more boring. As a member of the Intergalactic Brotherhood of Teamsters, and because I have the rare genetic defect that allows The Elixr to work, I get to be a Bounder.
Most people spend 90% of their time traveling in space in Hypersleep, a strange sleeplike-stasis-like state that allows them to age at 1/100th of the normal rate. Because of my genetic defect, and The Elixr, I can enter "hypersleep" while completely awake, and not age at all for years at a time.
Biologically, i'm about forty. In earth-bound years, I'm about two hundred and fifty. And i'm probably the youngest bounder, having been the first person in 175 years to be born with The Defect. I didn't get much of a choice in careers; I was pretty much drafted.
I was reading an old David Weber novel on the bridge when Spider, the ship's AI called for my attention.
"Yes, Spider, what is it?"
"Sir, there's... I guess it's a message coming through."
"You guess? A message? Explain please."
I could see the activity lights on Spider's presence panel illuminate. This meant he was thinking. Unless you dealt with AI's as much as I have, you'd not understand that this was a pretty big deal.
"Sir, I had offlined Quantum CPU Delta due to anomalous results from it. I've been monitoring it to try and figure out the failure to see if it can be repaired, or if we need one from the stores. I've been watching it for about an hour now, and I've noticed a pattern."
The lights on his panel grew brighter.
"Sir, how much detail do you want? This explanation might take some time."
I sighed. "Spider, explain it to me as quickly as possible."
"Yes Sir. Two of the qubits in Quantum CPU Delta are no longer entangled properly. That is, they are randomly dis-entangled for certain processes, rendering the computing anomolous, hence why I offlined it. Much like how random neutrinos can mess with old solid-state electronics, but that should be impossible with this hardware. After watching for a while, I noticed a pattern. I examined the pattern, and noticed it contains a message."
I raised an eyebrow. "How? What kind of message?"
"Sir, the explanation would take about fifteen hours to make, and unless you are well versed in quantum mechanics, you wouldn't understand. Just trust me. It spells out a short message, over and over."
"Well, Spider, what's the message?"
"The message is as follows. 'I wouldn't go any further if I were you.'"
I involuntarily shivered. "Wow, now THAT's not creepy at all, now is it?"
"I don't think I am qualified to judge creepiness, sir, but it's certainly not something i'd have expected to encounter. As much as is possible for me, i'd say that it makes me nervous."
"That is the textbook definition of creepy, Spider."
I wouldn't go any farther if I was you.
There's no gravity gate anywhere near here in which we could slingshot, and we certainly