Hot, sweaty, and a mess, Nathan stumbled up the rocky road incline, the chocolate boiling his feet. The cone of the volcano was far below, farther than even Nathan had suspected, surmounting the dark chocolate rim. Pure ice cream gushed out of the waffle cone in a gooey mess, the temperature too hot to sustain a solid vanilla. Nathan checked his watch, still broken. The blueberry falls had done that some two days earlier when a gummy bear chased him off a cliff. The island was a childs daydream; to Nathan some terrible nightmare. Chocolate wasn't supposed to cut up your feet, blueberry juice shouldn't try to drown you, and gummy bears shouldn't even be fucking alive! He used to work for the UK's Cadbury industry in the U.S. until Hershey's had made the deal to keep them out, and it seemed some cruel twist of fate he alone, out of an entire chocolate embassy, had survived the crash. To be stuck in his own licorice strangling hell.

'It doesn't matter,' Nathan reminded himself, Because I'm getting out of here.'

He lined up the pop-rocks in a semicircle around the MandM shavings he'd collected the previous night, and used his watch to reflect the suns rays. Nathan tried to stand away from the pile, keenly aware of the pop-rocks explosive nature. There was a spark! A tiny whiff of smoke. Nothing.

Nathan fell to his knees, defeated as the sun dipped beneath the horizon, wreathing him in shadows. The cannibalistic Keebler Elves drums beat in the distance, and Nate let out an irrepressible shiver. He'd just curl up and die here, so much easier than facing the howling Ho-Ho yetis, better than fighting off Captain Crunch and his bloodthirsty pirates, kinder say, than being pecked to death by a flock of murderous peeps. But he knew without thinking that he'd try again. There was a way, he knew it-- someone had done it before-- all Nathan had to do was figure out how.