It had been a tough day. My girlfriend had broken up with me after four years. She told me she could not see a future for us. So as she packed her belongings into her SUV, I sat on the sofa, drinking, not able to process what had happened. I continued drinking until it hit me. I needed to win her back, make my case for her staying before she left for good. I rushed out the door and sprinted down the path of the garden. She was on the other side of the street, putting her bags on the back seat. “Sarah!” I cried. She turned and I saw her reasoning her hand, her mouth partially open, her eyes wide. I looked to my right and saw the truck. It was just meters from me and my body position was all wrong. There was nothing I could do. I just closed my eyes. And screamed. Then I felt a numbness travel through my body as I tensed for the impact. An impact which never came. When I opened my eyes again, the truck was still meters from me, not moving. Nor was Sarah. She was still frozen in the position I had last seen her. She’s stayed like that now for five years.
Imagine climbing into the still frame of a documentary you’re watching. The people around you are still warm from the blood in their veins and the leaf from, the sycamore in your local park is caught mid flight on its descent from the branch. For you it may seem marvellous, a world of freedom, a chance to explore new boundaries without limit. And for a while it is like that. That innate curiosity all humans have to discover what they think has been hidden from them. Until you discover that some things are still closed off. Doors remain closed, wheels won’t turn, objects won’t budge.
For five years I have been trapped in a painted world, learning nothing except that I need to end this lonely existence. So I’m back at the point where Sarah left me. Standing in the road in front of the truck. I’m close enough to see the white’s of the drivers eyes. I’m urging him to move, for this reality to finally come to end. That’s when I hear a voice behind me.
“What are you doing Michael? Don’t you realise you’ve been chosen for a reason?”