Billy Bob drove his four-barrel wagon through the cornfield, minding his own god darned business – that’s right, his own and none others. Billy had grown tired of all the fussing on about meddlers, middlemen and big government ‘n stuff. Politicians digging through his pockets and now they want to till his fields. Momma ain’t havin’ none of it ‘cos they’ve got the big kids to feed now. Sammy, Sally, Gary and Bobby Jr. – and he ain’t even thought of his cattle yet.

Nah, ma’ makes plenty of work ‘round ‘ere and the last thing Billy needs is for some tie-wearing shmuck to beat him around with a stick ‘cause they think Billy smells funny. He ain’t got nuthin’ in the whole wide world (or cornfield) except for his family, and there ain’t no man who’s got anythin’ other than family.

That’s why Billy shot himself with his double-barrelled shotgun when he stepped out of the truck into the cornfield. Billy killed Billy’s family. All mush, no chance to say goodbye. The smell, Billy thought, I can’t stand that smell!

And that’s how he died.