My wife, Diane, was having a conversation with Nadia, matron of the house. They were discussing wine racks, while my conversation with Sam started hitting a more anxious direction.
"Look at those two, the more they talk the more we're both gonna spend." he mocked "Let's talk payment? Last time you sounded content with the price."
"Nothing so far has changed my mind, everything I saw with my naked eye is satisfied and at the least fair according to price." his eyebrows moved, they knows that next is a 'but'.
"I would like to take one more tour, but with the UV this time if you don't mind." Both my wife and his, simultaneously glanced towards my hand holding the device. Diane had a grin smile, she laughed when I explained this trick to her on the way.
"Jeez, you're a tough one." he sighed, "If it's about the hygiene, don't worry about it, once we vacate I'll pay for the cleaning and make sure they wipe every wall, let's just call it a deal?"
The deal was perfect, something felt wrong about it but I had to take it. Worst case I could fix it up and sell it for a significantly better price, this man really wants to get out of here.
"Deal!" I reached out my arm and we shook hands, Nadia opened a bottle of champagne and we clinked our glasses.
After the second glass Sam grabbed the UV, "So you a fan of CSI?" He turned it on and waved it around. I explained to him it's better in the dark and we went into the following room, the Laundry. At first sight I could see there were white semen stains right in front of the washing machine, I wasn't really prepared to know if this is odd or not, the stupid article didn't specify, and the deal was done. I turned to Sam and he had a look of horror on his face. I looked back and he was lighting in front of the dryer where it had semen and blood stains all over it.
He gasped and covered his mouth with both hands. I apologized for I thought he was embarrassed. He didn't change the look on his face and he started walking around whispering "Fuck!" with every step he took. I asked what was wrong, and he looked at me and smacked his forehead.
"We never had sex in this room, and we bought this dryer new." He kicked it's concave glass door "That whore!"
He marched out and threw the UV, by the time I picked it up and turned around he was dragging Nadia from her hair, and she was screeching in pain. "What the fuck Nadia? What the fuck?" He snatched the UV from my hand and pointed towards the Dryer, Diane walked in and had that look on her face when things get awkward.
"Sam, I swear I have never been with anyone else since I met you, I am just as frightened as you are!"
"Don't lie, is this why you call the same god damn plumber? Last month he was over fixing the sink in the guest bathroom, want to bet we won't find more of your disgusting slut stains there?"
"Jesus Sam, I swear I have no idea what this is!"
"Who is he Nadia? Who the fuck is he?" he then twisted her hair a little more and it was starting to get really uncomfortable
"I'm gon- I'm gonna file for divorce, if you don't take your hands off me you'll never see me or Lina again you fucking monster, half the times the plumber came here I was out with you, you bastard."
"How old is Lina?" Diane asked after Sam let go of his wife.
"13, oh dear god! LINA! Come down NOW!" Diane screamed and quickly began to fix her hair and wipe off her tears.
"It's time for us to leave, umm, do we still have a deal?"
Lina walked in, but she was too scared to go in the laundry room.