I wrote this about my favorite chocolate bar.

You can't shame someone and then say "that's fine." You're clearly passing judgment, so why backpedal?

Also — who are you? Why would I care that you like the same chocolate I do? This basically reads as "most people are uncultured, but you and I are special."

If Peloton emailed you and said "lazy people will use a regular old treadmill at Fit4Less, but fit people LIKE US need high-end workout machines at home" how would you feel? There's no need to shame other people, and why would you care about a Peloton employee's fitness routine?

I see what you're going for. But my advice? Flip the perspective to focus on the reader. Compliment their excellent taste with something like "You're not the kind of person who goes for processed chocolate bars at the grocery store checkout. Oh no. You know the difference between fries and frites. You know that it's "espresso", not "expresso." And your chocolate should taste like "cacao", not "coco."

You get the idea, right? There's always a way to make your reader feel special. Any time you write "we/I" or "they/other people", challenge yourself to focus on the reader. Instead of saying what YOU offer, or what THEY lack — flip it to "you can" or "you get."

/r/copywriting Thread