Yep. My dad never stepped foot in the kitchen, and was very hands-off with us kids. I grew up in Africa. We always had people helping at the home, but my mum bore the overwhelming responsibility of everything to do with the home, even though they both worked full time and my mother earned more in some seasons.

One night I woke up sick and threw up in my bed before I could get to the bathroom. I was maybe 7. I went to my parents' room and woke my mum up to ask her help. She left her bed complaining that we were so much work and my dad never did anything around the house. She asked how come I'd woken her up and not my father. I resented her for many years after that, since she'd made me feel bad about asking for help. This was a very formative event because I remember it as one of very few memories from my early childhood. To this day I cannot ask people for help if I think it'll make them have to go out of their way. Anyway, now as an adult I understand my mum 100% and cannot blame her for the stress she felt.

PS. Neither a mum nor a wife. I just like to browse real life communities so I'm not naive if/when I go through the same phase later in life. I hope that's OK.