A lot of people say it's bad to hide it but here's the thing; if you don't hide it a lot of people (probably most people) will either never want to be around you or abandon you. I'm speaking from experience here. I grew up in a christian cult. That place fucked me up emotionally, mentally and socially. When I went to college, I moved away from home. Doing this got me out of the environment I grew up in and allowed me to take a step back and analyze my life up to that point. I was able to trace pretty much every problem I had ever had in my life to the church and decided to leave it. I already had a ton of depression and anxiety at that point in my life but when I left something broke inside me. Leaving it was one of the hardest things I have ever done. The church is really against having good friends outside the church so when I left I found myself with no friends. My family was and still is in the church so I couldn't really turn to them for help either. I went to a small college (2400 students) and everyone pretty much knew everything about everyone so everyone knew what was going on with me. With only a couple exceptions, no one wanted anything to do with me. The few friends that I did have abandoned me because I was too depressed. They just didn't want to deal with it anymore. The school constantly checked up on me but it wasn't really to make sure I was ok, they wanted to make sure I didn't hurt myself because it would look bad on the school. They have a reputation among the students for this sort of thing and they just look for any legit reason to expel you so they don't have a threat to their reputation. I saw them do this shit to sooooo many students with mental health problems and they expelled most of them (fuck Point Loma Nazarene University btw, never go there). I learned a lot of hard lessons in college, one of them being to hide the darkness inside of me. You have to act happy and normal otherwise people just won't want anything to do with you. I have made a few friends in my life who have been exceptions to this and I would do anything for them.