I’m so frustrated You say that you love me You want to be friends I don’t want that That is so stupid I don’t know why you hung on to me for so long When you didn’t actually know whether or not you wanted to be in a relationship "Emotionally Unavailable" In blinking neon above your head I’m literally just replaceable I feel terrible I’m not sure why but I feel wronged. My gut says you’re not telling me the whole truth or you’re trying to be nice Well a self destruct was not the way to go about it I wish you would have just let me go when I gave you the chance I wish you didn’t wake up on a Tuesday morning and just decide that you don’t love me back anymore I wish I didn’t push when I should have pulled I wish you didn’t think I talked too much, or was annoying on long runs because I pull ahead, or that I’m too emotional because I try to talk things out when you’re sad, or that I’m condescending when I’m just trying to be helpful I wish I didn’t have to go through unrequited love I wish I wasn’t so selfishly thinking about myself this whole time I wish you didn’t have this design of how it should all go in your head. Now our lives are running in opposite directions But I was still there the whole time You don’t want to have to “fit” me into your life But you don’t want me to fit myself into your life either You don’t actually want to be together, because if you did, it wouldn’t matter. You want to figure your emotions out You don’t think you can figure it out with me or in a relationship. I just can’t believe this is really happening. I swear in the dark of this whole thing I just feel empty. Chemicals worn off or whatever Making me feel like I’m not good enough for you. You “tried”. I don’t want to be petty or mad and I don’t want to feel so upset over this but I can’t help but feel something. I’m happy I met you but I’m torn up that you’re making me leave. Maybe this is clarity? I don’t know why but writing these messages to no one brings me some kind of solace. I’m so tired.