You are being very harsh on yourself. And Holidays can be harder - you suddenly have time you did not and your fears bubble up. You have done as well as you could.

But just because you are tense let me give you some anecdotes:

One of my cousin, does not want to come to India, even though he grew up in Hyderabad. My uncle was very proud that his son is working for Google. It’s been 5 years since he has come home, (he is single not married) and my uncle to put it politely, is not proud anymore.

My sons friend (born in US), is just waiting to go to US, and to his parents dismay, is not ready to write any competitive exams in India. I could be wrong, but I doubt he will come back to visit his parents.